What does the future hold?

I was working on my development plan recently and then finally discussing it with my manager yesterday at work.  He asked me about what I want to do in the future.  It is hard to answer that.  My future is to get to tomorrow still.

I can tell you what I would really like to have, but it is not guaranteed that I will get all or any of these. 

To see the 2 lines again.
To actually make it to the doctor to confirm that a pregnancy is viable and not in my tube again.
To hear a heartbeat for the first time again.
To have morning sickness again.
To make it out of the so called "safe zone" that truly doesn't exist again.
To make it to and through each monthly appointment again (without a major melt down at the appointment or in between them).
To have to pee constantly again.
To have major heartburn again.
To have swollen feet or hands again.
To make it through a glucose test again (I will gladly drink that crap all day long as long as I can get there).
To make it through as many blood draws as I need again.
To feel the first kicks again. 
To feel those kicks every day, in my ribs or wherever else they end up again.
To go through labor and feel the pain again.
To hear a heartbeat at every appointment...
To have a live, screaming baby...

To have a peaceful, innocent pregnancy again...that I can only dream about because I know that will not happen again.  I know too much to know that a pregnancy never guarantees the end of having a live, screaming baby in your arms.